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Our Changing World

I had started a post about two weeks ago on the power of "no". I was in the middle of writing it when my youngest woke up early from his nap. I figured I would finish it that weekend while away at my in-laws...which, as you have probably deduced, didn't happen. When we arrived back home on the Sunday it was the beginning of Covid-19 really starting to impact Canadian life and it felt strange to pick up on the Monday as if there wasn't this huge change happening all around us.

I kept reopening the post hoping to, in some way, adapt it to the ever-changing world around me. However, as the days continued to move forward the possibility of doing that seemed, well, impossible. So I have decided to start a new post kind of addressing the situation we all find ourselves in and then perhaps I will go back to completing that old post with all it's starts and stops.

I'm not even sure where to begin...

For a while I found it difficult to even process my thoughts as new and more information came in daily, sometimes hourly, and as soon as I had adapted my expectations and perspective it felt as though some new bit of information washed over me and I had to begin the process all over again. It has been a bit of a process for me to find the positives in all of this, to remind myself of the things I have to be grateful for. While I find new things to be grateful for every day, it can feel at times as though the realities, struggles and loneliness of it all can be a bit overwhelming.

I'm naturally a bit of a "home"body, which means that this whole self-isolation thing is somewhat natural to me. To be quite honest, if I didn't have kids this would kind of be my dream come true. Wear comfy, non-matching clothes, put my hair up and read/watch movies to my hearts content. I wouldn't have to figure out ways to say "no" because the government has already given the reason for me.

However, kids don't really seem to be up for this kind of chill physical isolation. For the first few days as my mind tried to sort and understand our new reality this chill type of day was partly realized.  We watched both the classic and new versions of Beauty and the Beast (or Booty and the Beast as my 2.5 year old affectionately calls it) in one day, ate lots of snacks and cuddled up on the couch with books. However, my one-year-old quickly let me know that this was not the type of daily routine he was up for so we have since changed our daily routine quite a bit. While we don't normally do very many playgroups or scheduled activities we are often out of the house once or twice a day visiting friends or picking up things from the store that I forgot to get on our weekly shop. These little outings have been replaced by walks, hanging out in our backyard or all of us crying at the same time ;). To be honest...this has been such a wonderful change. I feel so blessed to have the backyard that we do and to also live near so many beautiful areas to walk. I am also acutely aware of the blessing that spring and nicer weather is coming.

So, while I am missing many things...particularly snuggles with my best friend's newborn...there is also so much that I am grateful for. This time has made me so much more aware of so many things and has me more intentionally acknowledging my gratitude for things as well as going to God in prayer in those small daily moments.

There's this song by Nicole Nordeman called "Gratitude" and it feels incredibly applicable at this time. I'll link it here, and I'd encourage you to have a listen. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-PEzM-4VXdg WARNING: You may cry.

I'm not entirely sure what this space is going to look like over the coming months. I am highly aware that my education and training has provided me with some very useful and helpful knowledge during this time. So I may have that take a bit more of a front seat. However, I also realize for myself the desire to sometimes get lost in something not related to our current situation so I hope to write things that don't directly relate to it so that you can get lost with me for a while as well.

If there's anything you would like to see from me, please let me know! I'd love to write things that other people actually want to read.


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